Packie Posts

The Officially Unofficial Rules of Beer Pong

Beer pong illustration. Ping pong ball falling in red plastic cup with splashing beer. Classic party drinking game clip art.

Okay so I have no interest in explaining the simple rules of beer pong to you. If you are reading this then you are definitely the kind of person that is played beer pong every single weekend at one point or another in life or you clicked this link by accident. It’s definitely one of the two. However there are several parts of this game that apparently need clarifying. Luckily you have a (self proclaimed) beer pong expert to clear things up for you.

 

Bitch Cup

    This is the center cup in the rack. If this cup is made first there is usually some sort of punishment.  Most commonly pants off, shirt off, play from your knees, or something like that until you make another cup. Pretty straight forward. Whatever your bitch cup rule is should be established as either a house rule or made before the games begin. You need consistency from game to game with your bitch cup rule or you look like a damn fool.

 

Electricity

     For those of you who don’t know electricity is when the ball hits off other cups before landing in one. If you are playing electricity every cup then all touches will be pulled. Nobody over the age of 16 should be playing with electricity. A completely ridiculous rule that turns this game of great skill and precision into one of luck and stupidity.

 

Death Cup

     Once a cup is made that cup is the death cup. The defense must remove the ball from the cup before the second shooter makes it in that cup. Basically if you and your partner make the same cup and your opponents failed to remove the first shooters ball from the cup then that is game over. You win. Your opponents do not get a rebuttal. They do not pass go. They do not collect $200.

 

Heating Up/ On Fire

     If you fail to announce that you are heating up or on fire then you lose that opportunity. Say it kid and proud.

 

Ring of Fire

     If you notice if you make all the corner cups and bitch cup then you are left with a circle of cups. This is the ring of Fire. To win both you and your partner must shoot and get the balls to sit inside the ring. If you accomplish this that is it. Game over. You win. They lose. No rebuttals.

Bounce Shots

      Bouncing it in is worth two cups. The one you made and one of your opponent’s  choice. Once it bounces it’s live for your opponents to play defense so don’t be surprised when they slap that shit back in your face.

 

Rebounds

     If you or your partner shoot and miss and the ball ends up back in your hand without hitting the ground then you can shoot again. Guys go behind the back and a make is worth two. Girls have a choice to either go lefty for one cup or behind the back for two because sexism.

 Rebuttal

     You can not win on a rebuttal. The most you can do is force overtime. In overtime the team that got a rebuttal goes second.

    

Thanks for letting me clarify for all you fucks. Feel free to tell me in the comments that I’m wrong, but chances are I won’t really care.

-Nick

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