Happy Hours and Staff Parties

How many drinks to have when in social situations with your coworkers is a difficult question to answer. You spend more times with these people than with your friends. However, you need to be your work self, not your regular self.

Many of us try to toe the line by sipping on light beers. Maybe getting up to 5 or 6 before calling it a night and lying to your coworkers about how early you go to bed so they don’t think you are a psychopath. This leads to an evening of borderline sobriety and somehow feels like your work day was extended.

I propose a solution to the awkwardness of these social events with coworkers. The answer is to just blackout. All of you just need to black out. How to we get this to happen? It’s simple. All you need to do is avoid the beer and cider. Go straight for the hard liquor. Not sure if everyone will go for that? Peer pressure them. Regardless of age peer pressure is the best way to force a group into having actual fun. Slow start? Order a round of shot? Nobody will turn down a shot, because they will be scared of what you will think about them if they do.

Do not let anyone stop drinking. At this point you can not turn back. If only a few of you get drunk that’s embarrassing. You all need to. You are now a team that is about to eat overshare about your lives with each other. Just remember it does not matter because none of you will remember it.

Unless some of you do. That’ll be real awkward at work on Monday.


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