Weed Causes……….. Traffic?

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Fire is hot. Water is wet. Tom Brady is a god. People smoke weed. These are just simple facts of life.

In the least surprising news of the week the two legal pot shops in the state are successful, busy, and causing traffic problems. The fact the cities that these fine establishments reside in did not prepare for the influx of traffic is just fucking baffling.  This shit has been in the works for two years and you couldn’t get your shit together? That’s like only having two liquor stores in the state and being shocked that people want, no NEED to get drunk.  Just take a second to imagine if there were only two places to buy alcohol in the state.  There would be a 10 mile line of cars to get in the parking lot.  No shit they are causing traffic. Do they not understand how many people smoke weed?

Now as a former student at UMass Amherst my opinion may be skewed, but I was under the impression that 88% of people smoke weed (statistic from The Institute of Shit I Guesstimated On the Spot). I’m not saying that this many people are drug rug wearing, exclusively listen to vinyl, stoners. But, I strongly believe that this is the amount of people that casually enjoy the devil’s lettuce from time to time. So, no shit they are all coming out of the woodwork to buy weed. They have the opportunity to get weed without the awkwardness hitting up some dude they used to chill with in high school or starting a text with “hey man I got your number from Dan. You still doing $35 for an eighth” then meeting in a Five Guys parking lot for a PG 13 drug deal (Weirdly specific example could be about me or could be from a friend.  That’s on you to decide.)

People who stopped smoking in there early twenties are now jumping back in. They are gladly willing to pay retail price plus the extra 20% tax just to avoid the awkwardness listed above. In conclusion, if a recreation shop is opening in your city prepare for traffic because elected officials don’t understand that everyone and their grandma are breaking out the bongs for that legal high.

–  Nick

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