A ranch owner is sick of being attacked by aliens. He puts ranch up for sale.

For a cool $5 million dollars, this gorgeous 10 acre Stardust ranch in Buckeye AZ can be all yours! Behind this electronically gated entry rests a 5 bedroom, 4 bath wonder! It comes with a swimming pool, RV hookups, & aliens that might attack or attempt to abduct you!

The owner (John Edmonds) believes the ranch sits on a portal that links the ranch to another universe in which alien beings pass through and cause shenanigans. “Edmonds claims he has slain over a dozen extraterrestrials on his property”  Some of them he has even taken out with a samurai sword.  A real badass right? These aren’t your friendly E.T’s. They have also tried to allegedly abduct his wife before too. John has also claimed they dematerialize once you kill them. How convenient. If it’s so common for them to be on his property, why not take a photo of one? I think you’re full of shit John. Let me explain why. (source)

Believe it or not, it’s not his claim that makes me think he’s full of shit. I would have given him the benefit of the doubt. Sure, you want to tell me aliens have been attacking your ranch, why not!  It’s the part about using a samurai sword that gives him away. That’s a huge red flag. Let’s talk about the kind of person that would actually own a samurai sword. If you aren’t an actual samurai, (he isn’t) then you’re a total nerd for owning one. A samurai sword is one of those things you buy thinking it looks cool mounted on your wall, but only further stresses what a dork you are. That kind of person isn’t going to slay aliens. How’s that for profiling.

alien sam

The alleged alien slaying sword alongside alien blood

If true, that would make John some kind of galactic warrior. He slices and dices his way through alien civilizations guarding the portal with his samurai sword. I’m willing to bet this isn’t the case. It’s likely a creative ploy to gain interest in the ranch.


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About whirlwind (262 Articles)
Movie Reviews and non P.C. takes on ridiculous stories from around the world.

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