Tam Hanks, is in Saudi Arabia trying to sell some technology to the king. His life at home sucks (as we find out in flashbacks and dreams and emails to his daughter) and also it turns out he’s not having that great of a time in Saudi Arabia.
On the home front, he had a divorce and his daughter had to take a break from college because her father can’t pay for it. (No one told her about student loans? Maybe she should just be a waitress.) Also he’s not happy with his career and choices he’s made. I wonder if he’ll find happiness or something in Middle East?
In Saudi Arabia he’s not having good luck. He sits in chairs and they break. How’s that for bad luck? Also he sleeps through his alarm a lot. Oy vey! Because of this he has to call a driver to get him into the middle of the desert because he’s supposed to meet the king to sell him some stuff. Turns out, his driver isn’t a normal guy. He’s a quirky dude! You can tell because his car is old and he enjoys American music.
So then some stuff happens, and meanders along. He gets invited to a party at the Danish embassy by a very nice lady. She takes him to a coat room and tries to engage in sexual intercourse. Old Tommy boy isn’t into it.
“What should we do instead then?”
“Would you like to hear a really good joke?”
So he probably goes back to his hotel room and hanks his tom while listening to some emo music because he’s so sad he doesn’t wanna get some from a nice lady.
If had intercourse with that nice lady the lady viewers would not like him. (He met a female doctor that he eventually has a relationship with once.) By not doing it you lost me (and probably a bunch of other men too.)
So we go on and revisit his past fuck ups for the entire film. At one point he goes into the desert with his weird driver to see his family for no apparent reason. They went to hunt a wolf, he had a shot but didn’t take it.
It turns into a nice love story but it ended with a weird voice over abruptly for no apparent reason.
This was not a bad movie it just felt discombobulated. It’s a better version of Rock the Kasbah maybe?
Tom Hanks was good. Some of the choices his character makes was dumb. It was kind of neat to see the romance blossom but it was too little too late.
Why so many strangely written and edited movies taking place in the Middle East lately? Who’s giving out the tax breaks or the producing money?
A Hologram for the King is in limited release.
TLDR: 2/5. Jumbled but not insulting. This one is going to be forgotten.
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