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The Fact That Fox Studios Had To Deny That Leonardo DiCaprio Was Raped By A Bear In The Revenant Is Amazing

What a lucky bear that would have been. -GrimeBone

photo: moviepilot.com

Fox News – Contrary to reports, Leonardo DiCaprio does NOT get raped by a bear in his new film, “The Revenant,” the latest from Oscar-winning “Birdman” director Alejandro González Iñárritu.

The fact that Fox Studios had to release a statement that Leonardo DiCaprio’s character, Hugh Glass, was not raped by a bear in Alejandro González Iñárritu’s new movie, “The Revenant,” is some of the more amazingly funny news stories of the week. Such is life with the Internet. Things can get pretty crazy and out of hand pretty quickly and a story about Leo getting butt raped by grizzly bear is something that you deep down inside just want to believe happened. I would probably pay good money to see that. Way more than a normal movie ticket. I will most likely see the movie anyway, but man, what an added bonus that would have been. One can only imagine that the energy of a cocksman such as Leonardo DiCaprio could be matched by a large animal like a bear and for a brief second, you believed those forces could collide. My heart is racing just thinking about it.

In my opinion, Fox Studios should have neither confirmed or denied that he was raped by a bear or not. What a great marketing strategy that could have been. “Come on! Get your tickets! See whether or not Leo DiCaprio gets raped by a large Grizzly Bear!” This is a real missed opportunity for the movie  financiers. With advertising like that, you could have easily taken down “Avatar” for highest grossing movie of all time. Heck, go back and re-edit it to have DiCaprio’s character get raped by the bear. The water cooler would have been buzzing about it for weeks. The sequel could have been Leo tracking down the bear and raping him back. The final installment of the trilogy would be them overcoming their differences and falling in love. Oh well, maybe next time we can make this happen.

GrimeBone  

 

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