You kiss your mother with that mouth? Next time, you may just want to give her a little peck on the cheek because according to the WHO, two out of three people under the age of 50 have Herpes Simplex 1. Though Herpes Simplex 1 induces sores in and around your mouth, it can easily cause the dreaded Genital Herpes through actively infected oral to genital contact. Think about THAT the next time you are trying to convince a prostitute in Atlantic City to give you a knobber without a condom on. Or when you are about to go full-on pit bull in a bowl of mayonnaise between some random broad’s legs that you just met at The Wild Rover. Take it from your friend Kenny Powers and use some protection.
Eh, who am I kidding? I still ain’t trying cop a hummer with a condom on or munch on some box with a piece of plastic wrap, Herpes be damned!